Unfortunate fashion trends

I ran across this image on Pinterest tonight with the caption “this leather jacket is perfect.”

leather-jacket

The source appears to be a blog called Atlantic-Pacific, if you’d like to view more shots of this “city slicker” ensemble.

The longer I looked at it, the more I realized how far my taste is from current fashion trends. Despite wearing thousands of dollars’ worth of clothing and accessories, I think this woman looks really, really tacky. Let’s start from the top:

  • Unstyled flyaway straight hair with dark roots showing.
  • Over-sized aviator shades, which flatter the faces of aviators, maybe, but make everybody else (especially women) look like dorks.
  • A shockingly bright shade of red lipstick.
  • Two button-down shirts with popped collars, the outer one of which is tucked in on only one side.
  • One sleeve of the jacket rolled up along with both shirt cuffs, the other sleeve pushed up to reveal both shirt cuffs.
  • An armload of uncoordinated metal bangles that compete with a really expensive-looking man’s watch on one hand (along with a thumb ring, ugh), while the other hand sports a huge, cheap-looking cocktail ring. Oh, and the short, black nails, which is one of the most unfortunate fashion trends I’ve ever seen.
  • Tidy holes strategically located in the jeans, with the cuffs rolled up way too high.
  • Bare feet in black stilettos, which are the perfect complement to that “I just rolled out of bed, threw on the first things I could reach and never even looked in the mirror on my way out the door because I’m sure as hell not trying to impress anybody here” look.

My first college roommate–a sorority girl, the exact opposite of me in every possible way–used to dress this way, and it would take her more than an hour to achieve that “just threw it together” look every morning–she really had to work at it just to get ready to go to class; you can imagine the effort involved before a night of clubbing.

Now, maybe I’m just jealous because I’ll never be thin enough, young enough or cool enough ever to wear such clothing, but this just does not strike me as a “slick” way to dress. It takes a lot of effort and a lot of money to look that careless about one’s appearance, so the whole thing is just a fashionable lie.

That leather jacket is pretty fabulous, though.

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