I’ve been having a crabby week in which I have felt excessively annoyed by the small stuff that is part and parcel of life. Some days it just seems as though there is one pebble too many in my path.
I’m still recovering from my cold, with the last, lingering symptom being an unpredictable but relentless hacking cough. I’ve been clearing phlegm from my lungs for days and still it won’t quit.
When my cold was in full swing, I had to stop using my CPAP for a couple of weeks, and have just gotten back to it again this week. The good news with that (finally, there is some!) is that I’ve perfected the fitting of the mask on my face so that it is comfortable, doesn’t leak and doesn’t irritate my skin. A huge victory!
But the bad news is that even with a chin strap cinched so tightly that it feels as if my face is folded in half, my mouth invariably falls open when I’m deeply asleep.The pressure of the air flowing into my nose through the mask sucks all the air out of my lungs as soon as this happens, and the result is an instantly dry mouth followed by a choking fit that usually results in a quick trip to the bathroom for fear of throwing up. This happens nearly every night that I wear the mask. If I don’t wear the mask and am not careful to sleep on my side (or sometimes even when I do), sooner or later my throat relaxes completely and the sides of my trachea touch—something nature never intended to happen, for very good reason—and again I’m running to the bathroom choking my guts out. My definition of a good night’s sleep anymore is one in which I don’t have to get out of bed, period.
My being a bit sleep deprived and still a little sick, plus the recent rapid cooling of the weather, has me starch-craving mad in the worst possible way. I’m trying so hard to stick to my diet (and doing well; I’m down 15 pounds now), but all I want to eat this week is COOKIES and PASTA and POTATOES and CINNAMON TOAST and stuff like that there. So I prowl relentlessly through Pinterest drooling over all the recipes and refuse to allow any of that stuff into my house because I know how I get.
Ah, but it’s all temporary, minor stuff. This, too, shall pass. I just need a nap and a cookie and maybe some codeine and I’ll be fine.